It's After Midnight...How about a Post

So besides being a religious jerk this week, I hosted a German meal for 7 friends, I went to Community Group, and I worked on my "little slice of the promised land".

Please be kind.  I am a bachelor.  I live with two other bachelors.  I have actually never hosted, planned, and executed a party on my own before.  I had no idea what I was doing but Amy, Nick and Peter were very gracious and helped me in the food prep.  Nick actually built a sous-vide device for the bratwurst and it totally worked! His machine was amazing and a total success. My goal was to cook a German meal so that Peter and Amy could at least taste a little of home while they start their 13 month unpaid internship with Mars Hill. I kinda succeeded.  Well you decide. My meal consisted of:

• Bratwurst on Sauerkraut with Curry and Ketchup (don't ask it's a German thing)
• Broccoli with Cream Sauce
• Asiago Scalloped  Potatoes
• Plated Fresh Vegetables (cucumber, carrots, and red bell peppers)
• Fresh Fruit (mango and black grapes)
• Spaghetti Squash with Curry and Soy
• Pear Meringue Dessert (from Mora)

This meal could have totally used a woman's administrative touch.

I admit it really wasn't all that German...and my timing kinda sucked (I was 25 minutes behind schedule on getting all the food out). I would arrogantly call my little dinner party a low-scale success.

Oh well, at least we had great conversation; my friends Mora and Erik attended and Mora spoke high German with Peter and Amy.  Mirella and Josue also attended and seemed to have some fun.

Last night at community group, David our fearless leader, who just got his green card, led us to 25 minutes of silence to ask the Holy Spirit to convict and reveal our hearts in several areas. These are the questions and what I heard.

1. What is God's heart/will?
• God is Seeking Worshipers and he invites me to participate in that joyous task.
2. In light of Pastor Fairchild's vision to bring the whole Gospel to the whole of West Seattle, how does my life currently reflect this?
• I really have not pursued my little corner of WS in the 5 weeks I have been here.  I don't know my neighbors and what their needs are. Where is my heart? It is apathetic towards my lost neighbors.
3. How is Jesus calling me to repent?
• God's will is taht all my neighbors would come to have a relationship with Him. God wants my heart  to change from indifference to compassion so that I would respond to the Gospel by being intentionally pursuing them for friendship.
4. what are my skills/gifts/talents and how can I use them to pursue that vision?
• I am hospitable, organized, and a little kingly, and every once in a while I am generous so putting all these together, maybe Peter and I can invite the neighbors over.

I loved getting a little quite time in community with God.  We them broke into small groups to discuss what we had been praying about.  Jack, who as I have said before I look up to and want to emulate, spoke life into Peter, Amy, and myself in his fatherly way. We shared and prayed for each other; it was awesome.
And the last thing I have been doing is working on my house.  It is going well, I hope to start spraying paint tomorrow.  The siding company left all kids of voids in the caulking so I have spent several days correcting their work.  But as a pleasant surprise, I got to meet one of my neighbors!  I prayed for God to give me an opportunity, and he totally provided.  His name is Dave and he lives across the alley in the red house.  I learned about his struggle to fix up and fail to sell a house nearby and how he is struggling to financially get by.  He is a little older and lives alone with his wife.
When I have painted my house all of you are invited over...Well I am the only one who reads this, so I'll just invite myself over.  Maybe me and I can hangout and eat French Truffles and Drink Ice water while we sit out on the deck and hang out with Andy the neighborhood welcome cat. Gute Nacht!!

40 Years of Marriage? Really?

On Friday I had the high honor of attend a 40th Wedding Anniversary and Vow Renewal.  I have never been to such an event.  Bill is a Mars Hill elder and Julis is his amazing wife who just shines with kindness and grace. As an example, at Mars Hill West Seattle, I make coffee.  Who am I? There are 650 weekly attendees here, and I am just some random single man.  Julis gave me an beautiful invitation, with my name hand-written, to their celebration. Who am I?  They had PRIME RIB and Cabernet at the event!  And I didn't have to pay!  Who am I?  I received the grace of seeing two people who love each other even more than they did on their wedding day 40 years later. They spoke of sex and an all-encompassing unity and total connection that has been nurtured by Jesus over the decades in front of 250 people with no shame and no embarrassment.
I mean I am a kid from a family where unity never existed and the marriage exploded not even 9 years in, looking at Bill and Julie and hearing they obvious love for one another, seeing their three amazing kids and their 10 grand kids, hearing their candid explanation of the horrors they have weathered, and the incredible legacy of the hundred plus couples who they have loved and served as marriage councilors and pre-marriage councilors; I think how can this be?  How can a man love and woman and provide well for her and sacrificially serve her and be a good dad and be an exemplary yet imperfect man and an amazing grandfather and an elder in a church and a man who I deeply desire to emulate?  Again and again they pointed to one answer, Jesus.  They are God's grace to me.
Oh and Driscoll was there to honor them both.
Observations jotted down during the celebration:
-Julia's children rose up and called her blessed - just like Proverbs 31:28
-There is hope for me that my marriage rooted in Jesus can last for 40 years
-God please help me to eventually be a man like Bill
-He is such a strong manly man yet he is still broken by the honor of being Julia's husband
-She spoke well of him and showed him great respect
-When she had big strife with her family he protected her
-10 grandchildren and he will leave a legacy for all of them - just like Proverbs 13:22
-My response, tears and sadness (for my parents) and a yearning for something like that for my future
-40 years is hard but it can happen, in Jesus
-Josh, make sure you dance with your daughters at every wedding and every single special event with dancing - be like Aaron Easter
-Be okay with making an idiot of yourself for your wife, even in public

Confession of a Religious Jerk

Another break from Alaska Posts.
So I had a chance to go and wish my good friend Elliott farewell at a party in his honor.  He is one of my oldest friends, a gentleman and scholar.  He departs for Tierra del Fuego in two days in his anticipation of the end of the world (or perhaps merely the end of civilization as we know it) come December 12th 2012.  He will ride his bicycle from his home of Seattle down the west coast to and through Mexico and on to Panama where the road ends.  He will take a boat to South America and ride its spine to the end of land approximately 9,348.61 miles later.  Truly I say to you this is an Epic trip and Elliott is a man big in heart and strong in soul for such a feat.

Cheers to you mate!! HERE is his awesome blog where he will try to keep us appraised of his progress as Internet connections allow.

So at this party there were 7 people with whom I attended Garfield High School.  The rest were strangers or loose acquaintances. After chatting with Elliott and wishing him well, I settled into a chair under the stars next to Collin. We hadn't seen each other since the times we ran into each other in the UW weight room when I was in grad school. He had had a bit of bourbon and He brought up theology after I mentioned that I had recently completed a brief internship with the "infamous" Mars Hill Church. He mentioned that Mars had a good influence on his buddy who attended briefly but Collin didn't like Pastor Mark.  I asked if he wanted to hear my story of how Jesus got a hold of me; he said yes.  So I told him the whole crooked tale in about 2 minutes.  All the sin and the depression and the hopelessness.  He stopped me several times to say, "What the **** man?  I used to sit next to you in Band class, I switched chair so I could sit next to you and chat.. I didn't know you were hopeless and in that place."  I told him that appearances can be deceiving.  I finished up with my mountain top and Jesus grace.  I really don't like to share my tale, but the reactions are always priceless because it can tell you a lot about where a listener is at. Collin is a deist of a sort and sees Jesus as a good moral teacher, and his reaction to my tale was a nod, silence, and a deep swig of bourbon.
I caught up with Jared later and he told me that he respects Pastor James Harleman from Shoreline and used to attend the Ballard Church before other Mars Hills were started.
So as I sat around the circle of chairs I felt a sadness that these eclectic and beautiful people, from the phone sex worker to the computer programmer, gathered to enjoy Elliott and his adventure are lost and in need of help just like me.
So as I shared my story  with Collin, a gal across the circle overheard a sentence where I mentioned Christianity and said, "Yeah that's stupid." So my ego took a hit and I realized that my religious side was coming out.  Throughout the evening I found myself getting all arrogant!  Seriously?  How can I compare myself to these folks and be all like, "I've got my stuff all together? You need to clean up your act."  Apart from Jesus, I am living the same exact life as everyone else at the party.  The only goodness in me is from the hand of God; all my religious activities are worthless for salvation! My religiousness is always crouching the the door waiting to rule over me like Cain of old.  God please help me.
Each person was looking for saving grace in causes, in relationships, in intellect, in their own pursuit, in the approval of their mates, or in the cosmic consciousness.  Each of the 15+ different conversations I initiated and the 5 that others initiated with me all revealed that they know something in themselves, in their families, or in their world is broken and inevitably they theorized either directly or circumspectly a possible solution. Such a beautiful opportunity to share a little hope with amazing people. Random and likely pointless aside: Even the fact that I initiated any conversations is a grace from God.  Before Jesus grabbed me at age 20, I would only initiate a conversation with people I knew well.  No, liquid courage was not involved!  But my 107 Old Weller Whiskey on the rocks was enjoyable with Daniel's amazing cookies. Last night I knew that the party was not about me being comfortable or just relaxing, it was about the 25 other people, it was about Elliott, and it was about the Kingdom.
Two great conversations and good convictions and repentance, a nice night under the stars on any date on the calendar.

Oh yeah Peter, Amy, Ryan, Nick, Matt, David, and myself went into the woods. Nick and I had the privilege of sharing a little American Culture with two Germans and a former Australian Federal Police Officer. It's nice when you can convert a young lady from uneasy fear of firearms to a little bit of a gun nut just by letting her shoot a 12 gauge (with low recoil rounds, I take 1 Tim 5:2 literally, so I try to be considerate).
And here's a recent video with no context. (I did have a clean back stop) LINK

Alaska Day 6-7

Miles: 2,715.7

Average MPG: 19.3
Gallons: 140.71
Bears and Wolves: 12
Alaska Beards: 6
Miles Hiked: 8.6

Wow Community Group was epic tonight.  First off, the Menashe Family saw me down at the Morgan Junction and gave me a ride down to Brandon Street.  They are an amazing couple; in fact I would "do a back flip off my roof" if I mature into half the man Jack is when I hit his season in life. David (pronounced Dei-vid 'cause he's a Brit, hmm I am too, but I don't call myself Jaw-shua, I respond to Josh, or occasionally "Hey Penguin!", or even "Hey Bone!"), our community group leader, left a note on the front door telling everyone to enter in silence and take a seat.  We sat down and waited.  At 7:30PM, Cole suddenly read Luke 21:29-38 and David invited each of us to set aside all the crap from our thoughts, all the worries and weight of what we are so easily distracted by and take 30 minutes to pray to our Father in quiet reverence. I sat on the floor and prayed to my Dad.  He reminded me how good he is and convicted me that I need to cut out KassemG from my 1 hour a week media time. I love that my God is so specific and takes the time to open my eyes to my blindness. We then transitions to small clusters to talk about what we had heard from God and prayed specifically for each other. After we closed in prayer, I got some time with David and Jack one on one and got some amazing advice from godly married men about how to honor one of God's daughters.
Oh and one more thing before I transition to Alaska, I worked at a Golf Tournament this last weekend.  It was the Boing Classic over 50 PGA event. You know how golf is really really really...not that exciting on TV?  Well it's just as "enthralling" in person.  Still I got to volunteer and help raise money for a hospital and enjoy a really big manicured garden and all the free soda and granola bars I could eat.  I also went to the volunteer appreciation dinner afterwards and I won a prize from Tiffany & Co.!!  You know the really fancy stores  with the vault doors in the malls that sells jewelry? Yeah I won a pair of Tiffany beer glasses!? Yeah they make those, and I now have some.

Alaska:
So I believe I got my days mixed up so I really don't remember what went down on day 6....So on to day 7 I guess.  Maybe what I thought was day 5 was actually day 6.  We might have taken day 5 off and just relaxed all day, I can't really remember. Sorry.
Day 7 was awesome because the day before I picked up our bus tickets so we awoke early and were on the very first bus at 5:15AM. It went from our campground out to Wonder Lake 90 miles down the road. We piled into the big green bus in row 4 and 5, that way were were near enough to the front to hear from the driver but not too far forward as to be uncool.

Funny aside...or maybe just lame you be the judge:  I had no formal education before 6th grade (except for one 5th grade math class at Highland Park Elementary).  So on the first day of 6th grade, I got on the school but for the 40 minute ride to Washington Middle School.  I took one look at the bus after boarding and took the seat closest to the driver because everyone on the bus was huge and very angry looking (I was the smallest and shortest kid in he whole middle school 6th-8th grade).  I huddled close to the driver for 6 months before I worked up the courage to more to row 3. In 7th grade, I made a few acquaintances and moved to row 5. By eight grade I hit my maximum coolness by sitting in row 6.  Through the next three years, before I dropped out of high school, I never developed sufficient coolness to moved father back than row 6. i don't know how that related, but whatever.
So we set out from Reilly Creek and our soft spoken but eagle-eyed bus driver spotted and stopped for these beautiful animals:

So we stopped briefly at about mile 50 on the bus ride, and Josue got to experience life as a Caribou:

So we continued out to Wonder Lake which is 90 miles from the park's entrance. On a clear day, this place has the best views of Mount McKinley, unfortunately there were too many clouds. We actually left the park without ever seeing the peak.  No big deal, we found other ways to entertain ourselves.  We walked down to Wonder lake and we practiced out walking on water skills. Notice the lack of ripples, these pics took real skill to give the illusion of the miraculous:

Man I love to skip rocks and I think I imparted a little knowledge to Josue.

We then went for a short hike into the endless blueberry fields.  I had my bear mace and kept my head on a swivel because we have seen no less that 5 grizzlies on the way out.  We only ran across a chipmunk city, but there was plenty of fresh bear poor broadcasting the big guys' presence.  The berries were tasty and were everywhere.  We came to a peaceful creek and we stopped for some food.  I challenged every one to make their own boat for a little boat race. The Rule was that you had to make it only from what you could find naturally occuring and your boat has to have an occupant. Some builders employed grass and used a little daisy as the occupant.  My strategy was the aerodynamically stable stick with a blueberry passenger.  I came in second, and I think  Tina won the big race.  We ate ravioli out of a steel can cooked on Nick's MSR stove. it was awesome.

The race track...the finish line was the little island in the creek.

We made it back to the bus pickup location and took some silly pictures near the sign:

We rode the bus back toward Reilly Creek and saw some more sweet animals, but this time much closer in:

It was amazing. We got back to the campground and enjoyed some hot dogs and canned corn.  We ended the night playing a Epi game of UNO. We let Tina make up the rule to the game and it was awesome.  She totally messed with us and we all ended up laughing all over ourselves.  I actually cried I was laughing so hard. 

So, Day 7 was another stretch of beautiful blacktop on my life's road trip.  I had the honor,  no the high honor, of sharing it with Josue, who taught me so much about what it might look like to be a dad, Yulia, who encouraged me and showed me what it looks like to just live the Christian life in a state of quiet expectant joy, Tina, who challenged me on my endemic self-deprecation in a gently mocking way, Nick, who helps me to see every situation in a new light and whose sarcasm jarred me to laughter again and again, and Mirella, who excellently modeled motherhood and kindly encouraged this childe Roland on his lofty quest to ride this life until the wheels fall off and reach the end to see Jesus.

Alaska Days 3-4

A little update from my life, Peter has moved into my house. Very exciting.  He flew in last night from Stuttgart, Germany and will spend the next 13 months as an unpaid intern for Mars Hills' West Seattle Church. He is a nice guys and he seemed excited when I invited him and Amie (sorry if I misspell that) to go out shooting this Saturday.

Miles: 2,548.3
Average MPG: 19.3
Gallons: 136.04
Bears and Wolves: 4
Alaska Beards: 3
Miles Hiked: 0

So I believe sufficient time has passed to continue to write about Alaska. I am not a historian, I really don't need to wait until all the participants' grandchildren die of old age before enough distance has passed to yield sufficient perspective.
So we drove on to Denali from Fairbanks. The rolling hills of the plains slowly gave way to the more rugged and more lush landscape of the highlands.  As we entered and cleared Healy the massive peaks of Denali National Park came into view. Clouds hovered ominously not unlike the fly-in scene in  Jurassic Park. We cruzed into the park and hit the Mercantile.  I booked 6 nights in Reilly Creek Campground. Unfortunately there was not an open site that night (total fail on my part, I should have called ahead).  So we packed ourselves back in the Traverse and headed South were there was sure to be a good campground.  There was it was called Grizzly Bear Recreation Area and RV Park. Think about that for a second...a recreation area for grizzly bears.  Hmm most folks might realize the not-so-subtle implication about staying at this place, but that didn't phase us.  After some shenanigans, we got a remote campsite over-looking the Nenana River and setup the mondo-tent (Thanks Erik) and a smaller tent.  After we all had our showers, we retired. I failed to sleep in the Traverse that night.

I woke first and started cooking some Bisquick pancakes and some bacon.  As we all awoke, we found the previously mentioned hood ornament (see the song bird). After leisurely packing up, we drove up to Denali NP and picked out our campsite for the next 6 nights.  We reset our tents and decided we needed to go out and buy some tarps since the weather forecast called for rain for the next week.
So I asked for any volunteers to go help me find some tarps.  Yulia stepped forward, so the two of us struck out. I drove past Healy AK without even noticing it and we ended up in the city of Anderson. As I look at Google Maps to assist my memory, the military base near Anderson looks suspicious. A large gravel mine, few barracks, and one heck of a radar array and some odd looking buildings, LINK. So the tarps, the poor navigation, and clandestine facilities aren't the point. The point is that I had the chance to share my whole messy story with Yulia. All the sin and my odd and resistant journey to Jesus. She asked probing questions and showed me grace when I named my sin and described who I was before Jesus. As an aside, I don't like to share my story, but I hate living in secret, so I pursue transparency, even though it feels like being stripped naked before a stranger as I hear the accusations echoing through the long abandoned corridors of my memory.  If I don't reject the lie against my identity in Jesus, then I spiral into despair.  But the truth is that I am forgiven, adopted, and cleansed and all my sins have been taken away.
So as Yulia (and Tina too) later told me my story sharing prompted them to share their own struggles and their own story.  Yulia is a woman who has been through hell, but knows her identity. I admitted I gritted my teeth as she shared, nothing gets me angry like foolish men who are dishonorable. So I eventually admitted my own folly as we looked at the map.  We swung back to Healy, bought two inexpensive tarps and roared back to Denali.
Nick had already been busy with some 550 cord (parachute line, and the exact same line that I used in my little picnic several weeks later). We ended up covering the picnic table and laying tarps under the tents. We had a lazy night as we cooked some of our beef in a A-1 and Ketchup sauce with some instant mashed potatoes.  We totally feasted on some s'mores.  We retired early-ish, and I tried to sleep again the the Traverse, but only managed a few hours.

Another delay in Alaska Posts

 Man I have been scouting, reading, applying for jobs, volunteering, and working on my house, but I have not been posting the other 10 days worth of material I have from the Alaska Trip!
Well as Ben Franklin said, "You may delay but time does not." So I had the privilege of cooking today! I actually cook quite a lot, but this meal actually turned out well!  So I'll share it.

I picked up some inexpensive cubed steak.  I don't know why it's called cubed, it looks like the meat guy at Safeway reconstituted some ground beef into a big square.

 So I figured I needed a nice sauce, I went with the old standby of Merlot, oyster sauce, and dried herbs. Don't you use the same mix for cooking meat? So you're saying I'm the only one?  Dang it! Bachelorhood strikes again. 

A little time on the stove...

 You just have to take my word, this meal was amazing. A little Bok Choy, a little Broccoli, a bit of beef, a nice sauce (I don't care what you say, it was awesome), some sun-dried tomatoes, and the rest of my Merlot.

Oh yeah, did I mention my love language / happy place / true weakness / guaranteed way to persuade me to your point of view is FOOD!  Hey! I'm not saying this is an idol in my life, it's just that I read Isaiah 25 and was like I need to practice for that! And if you ave a problem with my Foodie-ness (I'm really not a Foodie, I don't even know what braising is...my grandma mentioned it and I was too proud to admit that I had no idea what she was talking about), then you should just read Ruth 3:3 and repent! Just Kidding, we all have our thing and mine is beautiful smells and tastes. Speaking of which I hope my selections for tomorrow are pleasing to the palate...we shall see.
Oh right, why did I write a post today? Because I wanted to write about complementarianism.  A friend of mine made me aware of this lecture:

Here Mark Driscoll is introducing the Four points of the "New Calvinism".  His second point is Complementarianism. He doesn't just apply it to the roles and subordination in the home but also to the structure of the church.  In the church, Titus 1 and 1st Timothy 3 show that only good daddies and good husbands may hold the highest office in the church. And that the rest of the church body is to submit to the elders as long as they don't disobey God. Similarly, husbands are to "lovingly, sacrificially lead their home" in a way that honors God. Husbands and wives are equal but focus on different roles in the family and world. For the wife to be a complement, she must be vocal in a respectful way to help her husband. As the above sauce scenario demonstrates, single dudes are really quite foolish and need a ton of help. Without help and a fear of God, a man will never grow up and will never lead in a way that a wife can respect.  The transliterated word Parakletos really unpacks this hated term "helper".  If God is our helper, and by the way he is kinda Epic, then how can calling a lady to the same role be a denigration? I mean just look at the sociological surveys asking women why they chose their occupation. Dudes say, "Umm...to make good money and to look impressive to my buddies", but women say, " I wanted to help the World, or help these people, or assist this one person to a do good job".  Am I saying woman are all virtuous and selfless all the time? Well compared to the men I've met, they kinda seem to be awesome ( I know ladies are just as foolish as men...but they don't cause as many of the world's problems as men do). So I am getting tired, that glass of wine just seemed to work me over (I'm a total lighweight). Basically, my convictions point to the position of right hand / left hand mutual cooperation, dual submission to God,  with the man held to a high standard in a marriage. God promises to turn his back any man who does not lovingly lead his family and treat his wife like Jesus treats the church 1 Peter 3:7.

Insomnia is God's Grace

Sleepless musings interrupting Alaska recollections.
I don't care if the flow is interrupted I have something to say and that's the way it will be.
What was I going to say...? It doesn't matter; I'll just type until I lose consciousness and wake with the imprint of a keyboard across the right side of my face.
How about I talk about what I have been learning as sleep has slipped away for the past few nights.
You could say that something has developed in my life that is challenging and unexpected and has directed my attentions toward a review of what the Bible says about men as masculine defenders, humble leaders, cultivators of women and children, haters of evil, knowledge imparting sages, self-controlled one-woman servants, and upright loyal Christians.
Basically Driscoll has been yelling at me for days now.  It's awesome.  If a man looks at his call and future without the fear of God and without an understanding of what his identity is, then he will live to his own glory, avoiding responsibility, not serving others, not leading a family, being a passive coward, contributing to a world where 40% of kids got to bed without a dad, because their dad was one of the worst kinds of men who use and abandon women. Was that a run-one sentence? Probably.
As Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, 1st Timothy, 2nd Timothy, and Titus all agree men are prone to passiveness or arrogant chauvinism.  My natural tendency is toward passivity.  Apart from God I am a the guy who avoids confrontation, who will agree with you to avoid being seen as a jerk, who will not point out folly and stupidity, who will not condemn evil even when it is causing generational damage, who will sit idly by like my father Adam while the Enemy lies and tears apart families and friendships.
But what is a man if he isn't getting into trouble, if he isn't contending for truth, if he isn't speaking that truth into the lives of his friends, if he isn't prayerfully showing manly fortitude while opposing the Enemy of God?
1 Peter 1:18 tells me that I have been "ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers". My forefathers were passive men. By the grace of God I don't need to be like them, repeating their mistakes and teaching them to my kids.  It stopped with me. My kids will be different because of Jesus. Man that truth is so easy to forget. I need to be reminded often.
Grace...yeah I received a book from a friend about that. Here's some cool stuff from it:

"I've found that words tend to spoil ove the years, like old meat. Their meaning rots away." 

Philip Yancey is comparing the word grace to other words whose meaning has dimmed and festered over the centuries. He sees the word Grace as an imperishable words that has survived and infiltrated every facet of our nomenclature: persona non grata (an enemy of the state) means literally a person without grace, we leave gratuities at restaurants, we congratulated for success, we show scorn by denying a person grace "You ungrateful ass!" "You're an ingrate", and when a woman is assaulted we say she has been disgraced (her grace has been taken away). 

"...grace is indeed amazing--truely our last best word."

Yancey pays the word grace a high compliment - I would disagree, I believe the word "steak" is the most beautiful, most excellent, most honorific collection of alphanumeric symbols which unite into an amplified tintinnabulation resounding off the faces of mountains causing birds to sing, men to rise to war, enemies to flee, women to rejoice, and God to be honored.  Um... what the hell was that all about? I guess it's 2AM and I'm hungry... Seriously Grace is freakin' sweet. It is the most difficult doctrine for me to understand and I have to fight to not be deceived regarding it's impact on my life.

"[Most people] think of church as a place to go after you have cleaned up your act, not before."

Sad but true.  Folks try to use religion to manipulate God into loving them, instead of throwing their atrocious life on the grace of Jesus because He already showed efficacious love.
Um what else have I learned during my nocturnal roamings and MP3 induced sesquipedalian prayers?

Driscoll quoted another preacher who said no man can ever out-shovel a woman's capacity to love.  The point is that ladies have a greater capacity for expressing love that a man does (Men can show love but it looks different--it tends to be shown in action not spoken). This is a complicating variable, because women need to hear love to feel it whereas men need to feel respected.  I know I am at my happiest not when my life is smooth and easy, but when I feel respect as an image bearer of God. Driscoll's point is that a masculine husband needs to labor and be intentional about his words of affection otherwise he has "not provided for the needs of his" wife.  We all know the other half of that saying...
All my reading and auditory grappling has had a particular two-pronged focus: (1) encouraging me to rest in the grace of God and (2) demanding that I live in the fear of an Almighty God.  Fear of the lord is my only hope for wisdom, and man, I could really use some.
I might actually be getting tired; this is good.  Lemme go stare at the ceiling some more and see if I can stop feeling dumb because I can't follow the instructions that are so obvious that even the mattress company's lawyers don't feel the need to put them on the tag: step 1 - Lay down on mattress, step 2 - go to sleep.  Man, you can tell I went to public school, I can't figure out step 2!!

Easter Setup @ Qwest Field

Uploaded after the Easter event...

On Friday April 22nd, I got to the stadium at 8am and joined up with team "Ops-Elite". (Say it out loud several times fast and you'll see why we changed the name to the "Blackhawks") My team was composed of 8 "trusted" Mars Hill interns who had to be able to operate independent of central control and direction.

We started by setting up all 5 Connect Desks for the Event. These desks were places where visitors could go and ask any questions, get free Bibles, get the Mars Hill Annual Report, and get one of these amazing handouts:

We were treated fantastically by Mars Hill. As an Mars Hill intern, I am unpaid and have given months to God's work with no expectation of any blessing. Yet we were lavished with food at Qwest. We had like 7 meals all provided. For those of you who don't know my love language is food. ("love language" is a reference to this book that Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a while ago that says that men and women feel loved in one of 5 ways: acts of service, quality time, physical touch, gifts, and words of affirmation)

After completing the first tier of prep work, I jumped teams to the lighting team. I have worked for ERM a Seattle area event staffing service as a lighting tech/stage hand. So I knew how to do this job well. Here is what the stage looked like with our fancy lights up:

Here are some additional shots from Saturday as the work progressed:

(In the foreground you can see one of the 20 baptismals dwarfed by one of the two huge Led Jumbo-trons)

(Here are the faithful volunteers who put in thousands of hours to make this happen)

(From the 300 level North: On the top and bottom we see the Baptism tents. The far left tent is the men's changing tent, the center tent is the women's changing tent and the right tent is the prayer tent where people who want to get dunked will be prayed with and interviewed to see if they understand who Jesus is. The stage is flanked by two 35 foot jumbo-trons and a 40 foot stage where Pastor Mark will preach)

(From the Southwest 300 level of Qwest Field: Here you can see the 20 Baptismals that are pipping hot 100 deg F)

A funny story: Back in January when the Executive Elders of Mars Hill decided to do a massive Easter service they called up the people who organize events for Luis Palau (an evangelist), Greg Laurie (an evangelist), and others to see how to do baptisms in a mass-meeting like this (a perennial tradition at all Easter Services for Mars Hill). EVERY single organization said "Don't do baptisms!" its too crazy, you can't cope with the masses of people, keep things organized, and logistically keep up. They do them out in the parking lots all afternoon. Well guess what we are planning for...500 Baptisms in 40 minutes... That means that each Baptismal must accommodate 25 people in 40 minutes. That means 25 baptisms every 1.6 minutes must be completed for us to not run over time. Fou n'est-ce pas?

(Here is the Choir getting set for sound check on Saturday. Since the theme for the event is a happy sunny country fair the choir in their fancy robes act as the golden backdrop for the sermon)

Costco

Miles Run:12
Miles Biked:45.49
Total Miles:57.49
Days to Rainier:199
Summit Team:4.5
Aspirin Tablets:6

Today was a good day. It is my one day of total relaxation and rest each week. I volunteer my time from Sunday-Thursday at Mars Hill Church in a variety of ways. Saturday is my project day to catch-up and prep for the next week. In obvious contradiction to my previously defined day of rest, I installed 20 feet of 12-2 Romex and a new receptical (Romex, if you don't know what Romex is you are not a DIY type of person, tisk tisk). So without being electrucuted I updated and rewired the power to my bedroom to ensure that my new shiny computer monitor would be well grounded. I then knocked out 25.25 miles on my mountain bike in the driving wind, with only one minor injury (Biking Map). Finally, I cooked some amazing shrimp Linguine and watched Swordfish with Travolta and Berry. I know God said:

Vengeance is mine, and recompense, for the time when their foot shall slip; for the day of their calamity is at hand, and their doom comes swiftly. Deut 32:35

But something in me is stirred when Gabriel (played by Travolta) says:

Someone must bring [the terrorists'] war to them. They bomb a church, we bomb 10. They hijack a plane, we take out an airport. They execute American tourists, we tactically nuke an entire city. Our job is to make terrorism so horrific that is becomes unthinkable to attack Americans.

I guess I am just a jacked up guy, but vengeance...
This sympathy with Gabriel or Clyde Alexander Shelton (played by Butler in Law Abiding Citizen) and their causes of justice and liberty leads to a fear in my gut. Should I ever be blessed with a wife or a precious daughter. I know there is no power on Earth that would stop me from repaying anyone who hurt them fully.

Wow, man I got off topic. Like James Harleman says, "there are few experience specifically as compelling or challenging as being pulled into a film's story for a few hours."

So what was I going to write about? Oh yeah Costco!
"Costco?", you ask. Yes, Costco. Every year my mom and I go to the Costco shareholders meeting in Bellevue (except last year when I was on my Epic Road Trip). "Are you a RICH GREEDY CAPITALIST who is ruining America and the World by promoting the corporate executive system where men make outrageous amounts of money yet have no incentive to manage risk, instead they live only for the short-term thereby ensuring we will all be subject to frequent and volatile financial crises?!"
No, no, no. I support that system of intentional instability when I pay my taxes.
Anyway, I hold a modest amount of Costco shares in my retirement account, so I get to go. My mom and I enjoy the event each year because it reminds us that Capitalism is lovely and saves the lives of hundreds of thousands each year. It also allows me to buy the hundred pack of socks. Jeffrey Brotman led the meeting, the video presentation of all the cool depictions of Costco in the media (Jimmy Kimmel at Costco was the best), and the Q&A. The best part is the free stuff. Don't get me wrong stealing made the top ten not cool list, but it's not stealing when they say, "Here take it we don't want to take it back to the office." So I got 2 gallons of laundry detergent, 4 containers of chocolate covered Almonds and Raisins, 50 pounds (!) of sealed trail mix, 6 2.2lb boxes of Natural French Truffles (one of my personal favorites), 5 cool self-sealing storage containers, 3 boxes of Flex Free Glucosamine and Chondroitin tablets, three pounds of shrimp, a dozen bottles of Kirkland Signature Vita-Rain, and a sweet portrait of myself,. My mom got about the same amount of swag plus a full-sized dog bed for Fritz.
Thursday's Costco outing was a total win. I even ran into my buddy from Ballard Campus Security. So now I am fully stocked with training food (50lbs of trail mix!) and am even well rested or will be after I publish this post and snooze.

I am still calling any manly man or womenly woman to join me on Rainier. July is just far enough away to prepare physically and mentally. Join me. Beat Rainier.

Training...

This last week has been a long week with an exciting project I submitted. I even got some positive feedback from Pastor James. Very cool.
I got to sleep after 2am Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday trying to get everything ready and woke at 7:15am to get to work. Also, I ran 9 miles and rode 20 miles. These numbers are not spectacular but in my defense, I have not run in 13 years.

So this week I will be starting morning runs. Pray for me. I am really NOT looking forward to it.

I enjoyed some great Lamb Biryani at the India Bistro in the Ballard neighborhood of Seattle with my grandparents and my cousin Tanya. I got to pick her brain on running and preparing for my climb. As a professional runner type person, her advice carries massive weight, and I am very grateful that she took the time with me. Also, I saw The Way Back (see my last post). The movie stirred my mind and gut. Basically, after my long week I was gifted with a great two days to relax and recharge. But last night I couldn't sleep (even though I was in bed by 10pm). I was anxious about Sunday services at West Seattle. Worried that we wouldn't have enough security guys, parking guys, and baptism volunteers. But then one Sunday came, we had a solid security core, three guys on parking, and plenty of baptism folks. God delivered and everything went well. In fact everything went really well. We saw 8 people baptized including a counterfeiter and dealer who did 5 years in Federal. I also interviewed a 7 year-old girl who is solid in her faith.
Basically all 7 teams and 75 volunteers faithfully showed up, I tried to humbly lead them (as humbly as an arrogant guy like me can) to worship God, and God showed up. Game set match. So why did I worry?

Why do you think I worry?

Vegas Blog - Day 1

Miles: 776.2
Gallons Burned: 29.7
Elvis Sightings: 0.0
Total Miles: 15412.4
Total Gallons Burned: 511.1
Total Caffeinated Drinks: 86
Total Gigabytes of Pictures: 33.6
I'm in Wells Nevada in the northwestern portion of this great state. So far I have seen exactly 0 Elvis impersonators, disappointing.
My kind traveling companion Par has been a great co-pilot despite his lack of sleep. Using my latest piece of road trip tech, Par has managed to predict the exact location of a series of thunderstorms and flawlessly modify our lodging plans all without the need to halt our relentless forward progress toward that oasis in the desert. How did Par know the weather's location and exact arrival time in advance you ask? He used my new netbook computer featuring an Ericsson cellular modem. This enabled my co-pilot extraodinare to connect to any cell tower in our path and utilize the 3G network. Using Google Earth he verified local forcasts, checking often to ensure our safety.
How terrible of me, I almost forgot to thank Nick for his patient and excellent dirrection that allowed me to activate and integrate the GPS cabability of my netbook. Nick walked me through the proper hyperterminal commands to render the NMEA protocols active. This rapidly updating system provided Google Earth with our precise global location allowing us to acurately judge our pace and the best places to resupply.
As the driver for this road trip, I have enjoyed being at the wheel of Par's fine 1997 Mitsubishi Galant. The first leg from Seattle to Boise Idaho was uneventful yet beautiful.

The second leg of our trip was slightly more eventful as Par regaled me with stories and wisdom of the ins and outs of Las Vegas while the weather predictably darkened. We saw this as we approached our stopping point for the night:

Just as we entered Wells the rain began in ernest and lightening shown in the Sierra Nevadas.
Allow me to share Par's imPARted wisdom ;)
1 - In Las Vegas they try to attract people to gamble away their childrens', grandchildrens', and great grandchildrens' inheritances by offering very cheap food - so be prepared for $12.99 all you can eat Prime Rib!!
2 - In an attempt to destroy your judgement to facilitate the rapid transfer of said offsprings' future wealth from your pocket to theirs, the casinos provide free alcoholic beverages to all active gamblers - so even if you are playing the penny slots very slowly you can score a free drink (Par's personal record is a 19 cent Long Island Iced Tea)!!
3 - Smoking is allowed in all Casinos, to better promote all manner of vice - so if you have asthma and a gambling compulsion, you could very well die at the roulette table, hmm maybe they should call it 'Merican Roulette so we don't fall behind the Russians!!
Tomorrow we will arrive in Vegas, and maybe explode from our planned Prime Rib eating contest, tune in tomorrow to find out!

Wolves, small children, and insanity

I guess I'll post the trip stats even though this road trip is concluded.
Miles: 14704.8
Gallons Burned: 484.1
Caffeinated Drinks: 88
Gigabytes of Pictures: 33.5

I also feel compelled to admit one thing before I continue, I have been reading "On the Road" by Jack Kerouac for the first time so I may exhibit a certain violence/exuberance in my writing; you all have my apologies.
After catching up with my aunt and uncle and eating an amazing squash dish that kept getting better as I had it for leftovers, I slept poorly waking often to odd and unpleasant dreams.
I was determined to catch a little skiing on my road trip as it had been 20 months since my last alpine adventure involving rapid descent (rather different from my long and grueling hikes up Mt. Rainier to Camp Muir at 9,550 ft).
Zoom out to see just how awesome it really is:

View Larger Map
Anyhow I set out back up I-26 toward the Appalachian "Mountains" (Honestly these hills are often given far too much credit. They are nice for a Sunday drive but surely do not bear the one critical element that makes a mountain a mountain, namely the tendency to create widows). I await Jen or Alicia's rebutal, you see they have done something like 1,500 miles of the long Appalachian trail and they can tell of the extreme exertion required to defeat such terrain. Check out their cool story, it's the last link in my "Websites!" section.
Oh right! So I drove north but due to my lack of intel, I didn't know exactly where to go, so despite "the" stereotype I stopped and asked for directions to Sugarloaf Mountain. The oldtimer at the gas station looked at me confused. He asked if I wanted directions to skiing. I answered in the affermative, he relaxed as said why not go up to the Wolf? "It's only 15 minutes away."
Excited to be so close to powder I thanked the man and left with after purchasing a sandwich for later.
Much later I realized that Sugarloaf is actually the best skiing in Maine, not North Carolina.
So I valiantly drove north up to the Wolf. I drove a slow road into the mountains that dead ended in a resort community, back tracking I found my error and returned to the correct path. I skidded into the parking lot of a ski rental shop my parking was as follows (Notice the precision of my diagram):

The whole lot was covered in about 6 inches of snow, so I just rammed the car into the lot and let her be where she stopped. I grabbed some shorter skis (its been a little while so cut me some slack).
I managed to push my Jolly Green out of the lot with only 15 minutes work.
Once at the lifts, I paid for the really cheap lift tickets and hopped up the mountain on their one working chair lift. On my second lift ride I met a middle aged man on the lift who was an executive for some southeastern grocery store; then I met a pair of giggling stoners. The next ride was taken alone as were the next three rides.
After getting my snow legs back, I felt like a break was called for. I pulled over here and unpacked the back pack that Uncle Steve let me borrow:

I ate a fine roast beef sandwich, two Hershey bars, two wheat and cheese cracker packs, a quart of water, and some raisins all while enjoying the view.
After the next run, I joined a solo skier who was in line for the lift. His name was Tristan. He came out to ski with his mom, but she didn't want to ski so this 10 year old kid was braving the slopes alone even though this was only his second time skiing. I felt a kinship with this kid; we in our own unique ways were loners experiencing the purest form of solitude: being alone in a crowd (okay second purest form of solitude, the purest being locked away in your car for 12,404 miles to wrestle with your true self, equivalent to two weeks of solitary confinement in prison). So I hung out with Tristan. He was a great kid. I would be proud of my son if he was half the young man Tristan is at the same age. He held himself well and was fearless, he took on the steepest slopes with a thirst for speed paralleled only by my own. He wanted to push the envelope on his ability on skis and he visibly improved with each run. I never had a little brother (that I grew up with), but Tristan would be awesome as a little bro. With his mother's permission here is Tristan:

After I had sharpened my ski skills, I filmed a long clip of me skiing down from the top of Wolf Mountain to the bottom. It is the last clip in this little video project I made from my time on Wolf Mountain. Feel free to leave feedback(much love to the Go! Team who provided the music):

Next time I'll share more from Asheville...

Buckhead Church

Miles: 11057.3
Gallons Burned: 364.1
Caffeinated Drinks: 69
Gigabytes of Pictures: 30.6

Ok let me explain how I ended the last post. I didn't mean to demean Mars Hill Church. I love Mars. First of all the unofficial motto/statement of purpose "It's all about Jesus", obviously the amazing people, the individually missional character of the church, the "from the gut" declaration of the Word, the indie feel, the black (I love black), the...You get the point. Despite the "cultish" name (Mars Hill sounds a little creepy) it is a great example of biblical church (please know that I respect your at home approach Dave). So when I said:
"a church that made Mars Hill look like a preschool"
what I was trying to get across was the size, not the composition/organization/maturity/etc. Buck Head Church is crazy big. One of their 3 campuses (the baby campus) does Mars Hill in 3 services (10,000 people).
Oh yeah, you might need context for the last 6 sentences. I stayed the night after St. Augustine south of Jacksonville at a rest stop off Interstate 10. And crossed into Georgia early on February 14th (yeah I'm more than 2 weeks behind on my blogging). After a little PT, I spoke to Tony (a big gangsta-looking dude at that rest stop) who told me that he and his girlfriend left San Antonio in search of a little fun on a road trip. They were low and cash, and he said they would head up to Detroit to find a job. This little event stands out to me because all I could think to do was sympathize with him. I didn't know what to say. He was in a tight spot, and I couldn't really help him.
Anyway, I drove north toward Atlanta and made it into town just in time to be late to meet Eric at a Starbucks. After saying "hi" and shaking hands I followed him all the way through a huge parking garage and into an overflow lot. I didn't even know the name of the church. I just knew from Yuskie, a solid guy who recently moved to Seattle from Atlanta and volunteers at Mars, to meet up with Eric. So I'm in a foreign city following a guy I've never met to a place I've never heard of...great plan? Yes, it was. I was led by Eric to this building:


It looks like a nondescript office building but it actually is a custom built church. We quickly passed through a lobby reminding me of a dozen convention centers. And I walked down to the second row stage right. Thanks to both of you Yuskie and Eric. After a great message about Jesus, I called Eric and got directions to the "Fusion". Again I was in the dark with respect to the nature of where and to what I was going. Apparently they are church-wide alcohol-free safe-zones where professional singles from all life stages come to mingle and meet each other. So I of course bring a bottle of Washington wine. Yep. The south is a little different, especially about alcohol. I chatted and ate Oreos until the Fusion ended. Then Eric, a fusion coach, kindly let me stay at his place. We chatted and enjoyed each others company. He told me about the World of Coca-Cola, so the next day I went.
I expected a corporate center similar to Microsoft's lame little visitor center (never go, it really is terrible, they put no effort into it). I was totally wrong. The experience was closer to a specially visit to Willy-Wonka's Chocolate Factory. Here are some videos and stills of the magic at Coke.
The first Coke dispenser for the space shuttle:

All the recent Olympic Torches:

The Atrium:

The Tasting Room:

The best part was the tasting room where you can taste all the Coke products. Each stand serves products from Asia, North and South America, Europe, and Africa. You go around with a tasting cup and can try all of it. I discovered Europe has the Worst drinks. The absolute worst! South America had the best and the other continents were about the same.
Of course being in an urban center I had to eat Pho (pronounced "Fa").

I enjoyed my time in Georgia and I'd love to go back and visit or even live.
Next time I'll tell you about Tennessee...and the other Josh B.

Super Saints Win

Miles: 6810.4
Gallons Burned: 231.8
Caffeinated Drinks: 37

Still here on the pier in Flamingo Bay.
Remember how the Saints beat the Colts on that most holy of American days, Superbowl Sunday? (Congrats Andrew, you were right the heart of those Saints beat the precision of Manning) I really don't. There were some amazing passes, that fateful interception...something about the Who. My point is that I don't really remember the game, because I was with some neat people.
The day after my harrowing beach adventure, my official plan was to wake up at noon, eat some steak, and watch Mad Max, Mad Max 2: the Road Warrior, and Mad Max 3: Beyond Thunderdome. I accomplished my first two goals and even managed to start watching Mad Max when Cheryl and Susan came over to my car.
When I looked up and saw two people approaching I thought, "Oh no. What did I do wrong? Did they find out about my bonfire? Am I breaking some obscure rule about sleeping in my car? Oh no there getting closer!"
Did I mention my strong bent toward antisocialism...(I like Rand but I'm not talking about that kind of socialism right now). Anyways, these two kind and gracious beyond gracious women invited me over to a fancy RV to watch the Superbowl with them. I was so taken aback that I blurted something out then as they asked what I had just said, I said, "Let me get my shoes on." They didn't understand what I had said until I actually used intelligible words. Being a 23 year old guy from Seattle I'm used to being ignored, silently judged, sworn at, receiving the finger, and the like by complete strangers. So you might imagine what it is like to receive grace, mercy, kindness, respect, even...dare I say it...FOOD from strangers. Not just strangers but strangers who are different. Bill & Antje, Jack & Cheryl, and Brad & Susan are all older individuals who are either retired or semi-retired.
Suppose you see some strange kid with Washington State plates in a Florida State Park who has slept in his car the one day you knew he existed. Would you go out of your way to engage him (taking the risk of rudeness, rejection, even possibly danger)? How about inviting him into your home (the RV is Brad and Susan's full-time home)? I'd have a hard time doing that. But that's because I am not as nice as these six wonderful individuals. I'd like to publicly thank all six of you for your generosity and overwhelming hospitality!
I feel embarrassed that I couldn't even offer you any of my food (raw steaks, a block of cheese, and some Cheez-its don't really work).
We talked all through the game and shared stories on every topic from "special" beaches to a 170 mile-an-hour car ride that Bill once took. I enjoyed myself immensely and really treasure the experience. Unfortunately, I forgot to take a picture of them, but if you want to see them just close your eyes and imagine the 6 kindest people who have ever graced you in your time under the sun.
Feel free to leave a comment telling a story about how people have been kind to you.

Louisiana Bayous

Miles:5425.9
Gallons Burned: 185.82
Caffeinated Drinks: 34

I'm sitting half a mile pass an oil refinery on a two lane road frequented by hunters with shotguns and fishers with graphite rods. As the engine idles, powering this netbook, I look out at egrets, pelicans, and dozens of other unidentifiable birds. It's overcast and the trees sit out in the bayous looking like the masts of sunken galleons that have been locked in ice.

I can smell my steak searing on the stove under cover of bacon, and "I think to myself what a wonderful world". Um actually...I just had that great song pop into my head.
In truth, what I have been thinking about all day is a family's feeling of loss when they came back to see their house destroyed by the storm surge. The entrepreneur who put 30 years into his hardware store, building it piece by piece and defeating all opponents, only to have it scattered and laid waste by hundred-mile-an-hour winds. Even after 4 years the wounds in this community are blatantly evident. Whole neighborhood's with no one but rats for tenants. Wrecked shrimp boats dragged unceremoniously from highways and left to rot in the ditches. Behind each rotting house, car, business, and boat was a man's dream, a goal, possibly a life's pursuit. All gone, all "meaningless."


This volunteer fire department still uses their old partially collapsed building.
When I use the word "meaningless", I use it as Solomon used it. Meaningless is used over 30 times in his book Ecclesiastes and is selected to show how finite and how brief life, achievements, and pursuits really are. Perhaps "vapor" is a better term. The dude actually opens his book with: "Meaningless, meaningless all is meaningless." His publisher must have been an imbecile. You don't start like that! Who would want to read past that?
Well...I guess I am rather undiscriminating. Anyway, he lived it up: master of wealth, master of sex, master of political power, master of a nation, and master of reputation. His freaking house was way bigger and more elaborate than the one they built to God. He had a posse and a harem. And then he has the gall to write this book at the end of his life and say, "Meaningless, meaningless, all is meaningless." (He does eventually close the book with an answer to life's meaninglessness, you can read it for yourself if you want.)
I haven't lived very long; I haven't seen the deepest horrors of this world. Looking at the devastation here in the Ninth Ward and the Mississippi River delta, I think he's right. Life is a vapor, before I know it I'll be dead and all my achievements and pursuits (even my name and any memory that I even existed) will all be forgotten.
So now that you are all sad and (now a quick quote from one of the funniest guys I have ever met) "have a bottle of Wild Turkey in one hand and a gun in the other, wondering if you should end it all right here", what do you do?
Solomon answer: "nothing is better for you than to eat and drink and enjoy the good of your labor."
So I come back to where I started. Steak! Wow I love steak. It's so tasty and good, the rare/medium rare tender goodness just calls out to me. I wish I weren't driving back to New Orleans after this otherwise, I would totally pop open a bottle of Washington state cabernet and enjoy a glass with my steak. Eat my friends, drink too, enjoy your life because you don't have long to live.